Monday, October 29, 2018


Written by Counselor Adofoli

Love is selfless; doing what makes the other partner happy is what makes you happy. Their smile is what you want.

It's not what they can do for you rather what I can do for you.  It's not what I can receive but what I can give. These include your time, attention, gifts and your life.  For the bible says in John 15:13 (NLV) “No one can have greater love than to give his life for his friends”.

You can't give love when you don't have it.  You don't force people to love you, you don't beg for love, you just have to be a friend and allow them to give you the gift of love. The currency for buying love is friendship.

We share with a friend, we stand by a friend, we depend on a friend, we understand a friend, we trust a friend, we don't lie to a friend, we protect a friend, we have faith in a friend, we pray for a friend, we open up to a friend. These are some of the things that make friendship special and safe. Friendship brings out the beauty in someone. Love is born out of friendship and such a love lasts.

To love is to be patient; waiting is also a sign of love.  To love is to give them your listening ears, for you can't love without listening. The two ears when put together, form the shape of a heart, it is an extension of the heart;  so if you want to get to someone's heart,  learn to listen to them.

To love is to be honest, you can't lie and want to be trusted.  Love and trust go hand in hand; you can't have one without the other.  It's like fufu and soup.

Lots of people in love are bankrupt. They don't have love yet they claim they are loving. They are in relationships to look for someone who will make them happy, someone who will give to them; they are in relationships just to receive.

Their love account is in a Zero balance and some are even in the negative.  They are selfish and greedy. It's always about them and no one else.  They just think about their feelings and not their partner's.

They force their partners to do things just to please them. If they are not pleased, they get hurt and want to break the relationship.

Even the little they give, they want something in return, they run love like a business. They end up controlling their partner and demand so much.  They put their partners in a state of competition.

A quick test to determine if you have love is to substitute your name in place of the word ‘love’ in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8. Once you pass that, you have love.  Then you are qualified to love others.

In conclusion, before you go out to seek for a relationship make sure you have a relationship with yourself.  Before you go out to tell someone ‘I love you’, make you sure you have said the same words to yourself. 

For you will get hurt when your “I love you” is not returned, but if you love yourself that much, it wouldn't matter and you don't get hurt.

Please share with your friends, someone out there needs this.

© Counselor Adofoli

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